How to have perfect table manners

Twoish behavior

I took Gemma to the doctor on Monday.  She has been out of sorts for a week or so.  A few days is understandable, but after a week of grumpiness, lack of eating and interrupted sleep, it was time to confirm there wasn't anything else going on.

We arrived at the doctor appointment and I checked us in.  Amelia sat next to me and paged through a magazine she brought from home.  Gemma sat on my lap and eyed everything/everyone cautiously.  After a few moments of examinations, Gemma hopped off my lap and approached the wooden toy found in every doctor office.  She played happily for ten minutes of so, occasionally pausing to smile and send flirtatious looks at the other patients waiting.

It started to feel like a long time.

Everyone who was there when we arrived was called back to the exam rooms (separately, obviously) along with a few people who arrived after us.  The toy wasn't holding her interest quite so much anymore.  A slew of new patients arrived.  The majority were parents with teenaged children.

Amelia was showing me a page in the magazine she was reading when I saw it the first time.

Gemma drew her foot back and kicked the activity toy.  Every bead and attachment jumped/slid/jangled.

"Gemma!  No! No!"

Gemma's face then broke into the most devilish, delightful smile you have ever seen.  Two of the parents of teens laughed out loud at the sight of her angelic curls and naughty smile.  In the space of a heartbeat, she dramatically pulled her foot back again, checked to be sure I was watching and kicked the toy again.

I covered my smile with my hand and I pulled her onto my lap for a short time out.

Moments later, she wiggles away and pretends to look out the window for only a second before returning to the toy in the center of the room.  This time she stands on the side furthest away from me before completing the same routine: check to be sure Mama is watching, dramatic wind up with the leg and a swift kick.  And then again as I'm walking around the toy to pick her up again.

Back to my lap.  I remind her we don't kick and she giggles and tries to wiggle away.

We repeat this over three more times until she has kicked each side of the toy (and back to the first side again) to determine if the rules are going to be consistent.

They were.

We were finally called back to an exam room, which ended the game.

She did not have an ear infection or any other physical ailment that the doctor could diagnose. Her only physical problem was that her bottom molars are broken through and her upper molars are starting to come through. 

Amelia funny

This actually happened last spring, and I may have even written something then.  However, I'm afraid I didn't write it down, so I'm doing it now.  I'm doing now because I'm still laughing about this.


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Amelia, William and Gemma spent the day with our baby sitter/day care provider/friend while I had to work and the kids were off of school.  Her children and ours play together reasonably well most of the time and BOTH sets of kids love this special treat.  I always offer to pack lunch for the kids to make this easier for her, but she usually declines because it is easier to feed everyone the same thing.  Ie: If I bring something she doesn't have on hand, it is guaranteed that her kids will desperately want what I packed which will lead to unhappiness.  So, I usually don't pack a lunch and pay extra for the days she is feeding our crew.

I returned several hours later when my class I teach was over and asked how the day went.

The sitter replied that they kids had played and played and played together.  Everything was wonderful until lunchtime.  For lunch, the sitter told the kids that they would be having spaghetti.

Amelia LOVES spaghetti.  She loves noodles and she loves tomatoey sauce.  She likes it when I make it mildly flavored or when I spice it up.  The loves all varieties of noodles and is extremely accommodating to most alterations to our recipe - I follow a general recipe, but it rarely turns out the same twice.

When the kids were called to the table for lunch, Amelia was so horrified by the spaghetti, she refused to eat any of her lunch.

See, the sitter made spaghetti-o's.  This was NOT spaghetti in her book.

Later in the car we discussed:

Amelia: MOM.  MOM.
Mom: What Amelia?
Amelia:  Mooooooom!  (insert sitter's name) said we would have spaghetti for lunch!  But it wasn't TRUE!  She made something with noodles, but is was NOT spaghetti.
Mom: Oh.  That sounds interesting*.  What did you think?
Amelia: (voice gets louder and louder)  She called it spaghetti, BUT IT WAS NOT SPAGHETTI.  I did not like it. I did not eat any lunch.  I can't believe she thinks THAT IS SPAGHETTI.
Mom: Amelia!  She made you lunch.  You don't have to like it, but you have to be polite.  I hope you were polite and said "thank you"!
Amelia: I was polite!  I said, "No thank you because that is NOT spaghetti."  I did not like it at ALL mom.  It was not spaghetti.  I didn't eat ANY MORE OF IT.  It was awful!
Mom: Okay, Amelia.  (make a mental note to call our sitter and apologize for Amelia's impolite behavior).  Let's talk about something else now - what games did you play?
Amelia: Humph.
William: (in a quiet voice)  I loved that spaghetti.  I ate all of it.  It was awesome.
Amelia: GAHHHHHHHHHHH!  MOOOOOOOOM!



*For the record, I am not a fan of the spaghetti-o's either.  They smell funny and I think they taste funny.  I'm not opposed to other people eating them, I just would prefer not to eat them.  Or smell them. 

Observation

Gemma is the third child I have taught their colors*.  Each and every time I have worked on colors with a child I am blown away by the complexity of our world.  There are not just 3-5 simple colors in our world.  No.  There are hundreds of colors and a multitude of variation.  Is that shirt blue?  Or green?  Buses are usually portrayed as yellow, the one in this book appears orange.  What color is it? The overlap and sheer volume of possibilities is staggering.  Especially when you are trying to break it down and explain it to a one year old.



*I use the word taught here loosely as I'm not sure that I did much.  It seems months go by of prompting, instructing, and standing on my head with no response.  Then boom.  Without warning in the course of a day, the child knows all the colors.  Did I assist?  Yes.  Did they learn it because of me?  No.  This was true with all 3 of the kids. 

More valentines

A few years ago, I made these felt envelopes to hold valentines. I pull them out every year and stick in the valentines from family that arrive for each kiddo. The kids love pulling out all the love from the envelopes.

This year was a little rushed. We had freezing rain in the morning and William was off school. Amelia still had her Spanish class at school. I ran to the big grocery store while the kids had a play date. I ran my groceries home and my battery in the car died. Which meant my 3 kids were at a friends' house and I was stuck.

Luckily, John came home early and it wasn't a big deal to get the car up and running again. However, we got busy with the installing of the new battery and related details that I forgot to take Amelia to her school valentine party. I feel terrible! Luckily, she had a lot of other great things going on so she didn't complain too much about missing the party.

Valentine gifts

The day before valentine's day, John took the kids out to get supplies for our traditional fondue evening (I was at work). Apparently, the children convinced daddy I was in need of flowers for Valentine's day. John tried to explain to the kids about my rules about this holiday:

1. Flowers die quickly (cut flowers) and cost a lot around Valentine's Day. I'm pretty sure at one point the words "I forbid you to spend money on such a wasteful expense..." Or something along those lines.

The kids disagreed and I now the owner of a beautiful and fragrant plant that begins with an h.


Secondly, William produced this "craft" for John and I at his Valentine party.

My valentine sweeties

Aren't they cute?

Better late than never, right?

Molars

Gemma is cutting her molars. Which is great for eating and all, but it really stinks for the sleeping and overall general happiness part. I was able to feel the tips of the bottom two molars poking through earlier this week. Then she bit me and I haven't been back to check again.... I like my do fingers!

Sent from my iPhone

Pig tails

So adorable! Although I admit, I hate to tame the curly locks down into any hair style!

Sometimes

Sometimes the demands of my job are impossibly stressful (find something healthy this 1 year old will put in her mouth! You loose for the second day in a row as she threw everything on the floor!).

Other times, the perks are great. For example occasionally I am able to fall asleep on the job. Which my husband finds so funny he documents with pictures.

More ham

This one features Gemma directing a family game of peek a boo (Amelia! Now daddy! Mama! Amelia's turn!), some silly faces, an attempt the throw everything on the floor from her tray and then a hilarious segment "no no-ing" either me or herself.

Be prepared

You never know what you will encounter in a book!

More ham

This girl. This girl cracks me up!

Do you like ham?

We have plenty at our table! Gemma loves to copy/mimic/make crazy faces. Here she is making faces with daddy.

Amelia conversations

This morning Amelia had a Spanish class at her preschool.  While they were waiting for the teacher to come back to their room, the kids were talking about the letter/s of the week (this week:S, V, W).  Amelia and I had the following conversation in the car on the way home:

Amelia: Mommy, somebody brought something really, really funny for a W.
Mama: They did? (turning left, traffic, etc)
Amelia: They did!  It was a wh------ pillow!
Mama: I couldn't hear you, what?
Amelia: It was a pillow!  A whapping pillow! (hysterical laughter)
Mama: Hmmm...I don't think I know what it is, Amelia.
Amelia: It was a cushion and when you pressed on it (whispers) it would make a ftttttt sound.  Like a toot! (hoots with laughter).
Mama: Ohhhh....now I know!
Amelia: Paige was wearing pink today. (and we've moved on)

So apparently, someone brought in their whoopie cushion for the letter of the day.  This would explain all the giggling going on when I came to pick Amelia up.  They were still laughing about it.
____

Amelia and I were spending a little time together this afternoon after lunch.  Gemma was supposed to be napping (in reality, she was in her crib playing, tossing toys and blankets on the floor while yelling for MAMA).  Amelia asked to do a puzzle and picked out the state puzzle.

Amelia: Mom?
Mama: Yes?
Amelia: Where does Alabama go?
Mama: It goes near the bottom (distracted.listening to Gemma).  It goes under Missouri.
Amelia: (big sigh) Mom.  It does not go under Missouri. (patient voice).  It ARKANSAS goes under Missouri.

Let's just take a moment to ponder this one.  My four year old daughter has just corrected my US geography.

Things

This week I have wipe color crayon off of the following things:
1. The side of the tub
2. Inside the tub
3. The toilet
4. The kitchen floor
5. the kitchen table
6. Gemma's face
7. Gemma's shirt
8. A kitchen chair
9. the coffee table
10. My shoe

This week I have found toothpaste:
1. On the leather couch
2. In Amelia's hair
3. On my work shirt.  At work.  After I had been teaching for an hour.
4. Gemma's face
5. Gemma's shirt
6. The bathroom floor
7. The side of the tub
8. The doorknob in my room
9.  The bathroom doorknob
10. A library book

Not surprisingly, Gemma's favorite things recently are toothpaste (really any type of personal hygiene product will do.  She loves eye liner, lotion, chapstick, gel/hairspray, shampoo, toothpaste, and soap.) and color crayons.  She adores coloring and will sit happily at the kitchen table for an hour coloring away.  Preferable with either Amelia or Mama at her side.  She wants one or both of us at her side, she wants us to hold a crayon of her choice and then color in a designated area.  It's loads of fun.  As soon as you color in your area, she pushes your hand out of the way and colors quickly over the entire area.  Usually with a black crayon.

This color habit is problem because it is almost impossible to just supervise only Gemma.  I am always monitoring homework, making dinner/lunch/breakfast or something that allows Gemma to wander out the kitchen unsupervised with a handful of her beloved "wrawras".

The color love is also somewhat surprising as William hated coloring.  He still hates coloring.  I used to have to bribe him to color and he would still complain.  He would check to see if the library craft required coloring and we would leave after the books if it required coloring.  At the time, I would not have believed you if you would have told me that my next 2 children would love to color.  They are really their own people from the beginning.

Overheard

William and Amelia were playing as I was throwing together some lunch today.

William: I choose the red, green, and awkward ones.
Amelia:  No!  I want the red and awkward ones!

(At this point, I thought I must have heard them wrong.  I crept closer to get a better listen/look.  They were sorting out dinosaurs and choosing which colors each one would get.  There are red, green, blue and orange dinosaurs in this set.)

William: Really, Amelia, all of the awkward ones of mine.  I should be able to have the awkward ones.

Amelia: NO.  No way.  The red and awkward ones are mine.

William: These are ALL mine.  I'm sharing with YOU.

Suddenly it occurs to me that the awkward ones must be the aqua ones.

Why?  I don't know.  I meant to ask, but then....

Gemma conversation v.1

Today was a snow day which meant a slower start and less schedule demands.

One of Gemma's new "things" is finding a cell phone and then following me around demanding "Mama! Baby! Mama! Baby!  Mama! Baby!"  What she wants is to look at the photos and video of herself on the phone.  She will happily do this 6+ hours a day.  She is a beautiful baby after all.

This morning, I needed to call John.  Gemma climbing into my lap with her usually demand "Mama! Baby!" until she heard the phone ring.  Then she said, "Alo?!?"  John answered and Gemma gave a squeal of delight. 

"BAPBA!!!"

John laughed.  Then he said, "No.  Sorry.  It's Daddy, not Grandpa."

Gemma stuck out her lip and attempted to throw the phone on the ground (Mama is quick and snagged it before it hit the ground).

Gemma changed her demand: "Bapba!  Bapba!"

Sadly, we didn't have a chance to talk to Bapba today - it was too early to call the first time and then the day got away from us....  She sure does love that Grandpa.

Gemma video

A milestone: Gemma realized it was her on the video screen today. Such a smart girl.

I had the camera on my phone pointed so we could see ourselves. Partway through the video, she reached up and touched the spot on her eyebrow she hurt last week that still has a noticeable little scab.

She babbles about a ball, talking to grandpa, baby/mama, and ball again.

Science fair project

Today was science project day! I dropped William off at school today (science projects are not allowed on the bus) and said a little prayer that the project would make it to the fair.

William's project was an investigation about what soil type makes the best fossils.

William's pinewood car

Here is William's pinewood derby racecar.

He wanted it to look like a dinosaur. I think we accomplished that much...!

Amelia's pinewood car

Here is Amelia's pinewood derby car.

She painted it herself and wanted the back to have a "zig zag" design.

Blondie

I wonder what little blonde person got ahold of my phone? Someone has figured out how to turn on the camera without unlocking the phone!

Lazy Saturday

We didn't have anywhere to be this morning. This was great because a) the weather was rainy/sleety/cold and b) we've spent the last few weekends running around. We were lazy and didn't get dressed right away. When we finally got everyone dressed, I asked John to comb Gemma's hair in the bathroom. John stood up to walk towards the bathroom.

Mama: Gemma! Gemma! Go with daddy and comb your hair!

Gemma: (gives me a long look. Puts the hood of her sweatshirt up over her hair. She then turned around and toddled after John into the bathroom.)

Too beautiful

Last night, John cooked up a new to is vegetable pasta recipe. (It was good). Going in, we decided we weren't going to suffer through trying to make the kids eat this*. Some nights you just want to eat your fancy grown up meal in peace without kid whining.

In the chaos of getting everything served and to the table, the grown up meal made it to the table before the chicken nuggets. When William saw me carrying this plate, his eyes got wide. I knew he was worried about what would be on his plate.

Mama: hey William! Look at all these colors on my plate!
William: (nods head slowly)
Mama: isn't it great? Don't you want for try it?
William: NO WAY
Mama: (pretends to have hurt feelings) what? You don't want any of this special colorful pasta?
William:No...I.......no, mom. I don't want to eat any. It is just too beautiful to eat.


Nice save William, nice save.



*the usual house policy is: there is one meal. You don't have to like it, but you should try it. On nights we have something more "grown up", I try and bulk up on the fruit or other side item I know the kids will eat. This way, they get to try new things and I don't have to worry about putting the to bed hungry.